Seeing the Symptoms | Mental Health Awareness Month

Anxiety can entirely consume a person. It can make you feel helpless, like you can't breathe, like you're stuck inside you're own head and can't get out. And as with any 'invisible illness,' you never know who may be suffering. With the stigma attached to mental illness, you often don't see how badly someone might be suffering, if at all. I know for me personally, I feel embarrassed when I have to admit to someone that I was just vomiting because I was so anxious, or when I have to hide my on-coming tears when I feel a panic attack coming on in public. A lot of people don't understand how that feels, so the stigma of mental illness being an 'exaggeration' or a character flaw still lingers.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, which I've decided is the perfect time to officially debut my photography series on anxiety, which I've titled "Seeing the Symptoms." I've always felt awkward about openly talking about my feelings and intimate details like that, so when I decided I wanted to spread awareness about my symptoms, I figured using photography would be a much better route. Even as I'm writing this, I have this feeling of underlying anxiety that I have no idea how to describe, other than by the feeling portrayed in this picture.

I'm going to try and post a photo from this series at least once a week all throughout the month of May. Let's try to support each other and end the stigma ♥

Photos | At The Zoo

Hey, look who's (attemping) to post again? I've been in a slump ever since the semester started, and it's been a damn busy one. I've had no time to think about anything other than school/work, let alone think about this blog. But I got a rare day off a few weeks ago, and was able to tag along with Skylar's family to the Zoo!

I've posted some photos from when I've visited the zoo before, but I never felt like they turned out very well. I've only ever tried to shoot with my kit lens when at the zoo before, but it couldn't achieve a very good depth of field and my photos always came out looking flat and kind of 'touristy.' I decided to bring along my new 50mm f/1.8 lens to test out some more (I unfortunately haven't used it much), and the more I use it the more I love it! I'm still getting used to the crop (it's a prime lens, so there is no zoom), but I love the depth of field I can get.

At first I thought the glare/dirt on the glass was going to be a problem for taking any photos, but I think the texture actually adds to the photos and I am really digging it- especially in the photo with the leopard up there! I love seeing cute, fluffy animals at the zoo, but my favorites to take pictures of  are definitely the reptiles and fish, since they always have such colorful habitats. I am pretty stoked that I captured this gorilla with her baby, though! (below)

Well, now I'm back to the grind of my last semester of school. I'm going to make every attempt to start posting here more often, hopefully I can get my butt in gear and queue some posts up.

Happy Tuesday!

Photo Session: Baby Frankie

Hello everyone! I realized I never shared these photos I took last summer, which is a bummer because I am actually pretty proud of them. Also, it's the dead of winter here, and these photos remind me of summer so I think that makes it ok :)

Over the summer, I offered a few free portrait sessions on my photography facebook page. I had big goals of getting my photography business going this summer (that obviously didn't happen....I'm shooting for this summer instead!), and I thought offering some free sessions would be a good way to gain exposure, practice, and expand my portfolio. 

My first session was with 4-month old Frankie. Honestly, I was super nervous- I'd never really taken pictures of kids before, so I had no idea what to expect. I brought Skylar with me for moral support (and to make funny faces at Frankie). Luckily, Frankie was awesome in front of the camera, and I ended up having a ton of fun. Isn't he cute?

Have a lovely day! ♥

Bear the Kitty

This is Skylar and I's new kitty, named Bear!

Well, I say "new," but we've had him since we moved in August. Skylar and I were planning on adopting a cat eventually when we moved, but we were originally going to wait a little while, until we both had a little bit more money. But one day last summer, we came home to Skylar's parent's house and this fat little black and white cat with half a mustache greeted us. He was actually kind of an asshole at first- he was hissing at Skylar's other cat, and wouldn't really let you come near him.

It turned out that a co-worker of Skylar's mom had just gotten divorced and went on vacation, and asked Skylar's mom to watch Bear for a few weeks. Well, a few weeks turned into a few months, and the co-worker eventually called and said he was moving to the place he was on vacation at and wasn't coming back (yeah...haha). He told Skylar's mom to take him to the animal shelter if she didn't want to keep him. It didn't take us long to decide to take him with us when he moved. He had become so much more friendly, and he seemed to like us- he slept at the end of our bed every night!

Now that we've had Bear at our place for a few months, he's turned into the most loving kitty ever. It turns out that he just really doesn't like being with other cats- he likes being an only kitty. He loves getting attention, and will literally beg for you to play with him. He also has no qualms about hopping in your lap purring like a lawn mower. Plus, he is so chubby and cute!

I recently snapped these pictures of him, isn't he the cutest?

/End crazy cat lady post (sorry not sorry!) ;)

The End of Autumn / A New Beginning

Hello there! You may have noticed that I kind of disappered from blogging/the internet for a few months, but I'm happy to say that I am ready to get back at it again! First off, am I the only one who noticed that a bunch of other bloggers decided to come out of hiatus recently too? Is there something in the air? haha.

Anyway, I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety this year- and these past few months have been a real struggle. That's why I decided to take a break from blogging- it had become so forced, and I wasn't doing it for myself anymore. In my time off I reflected about a lot of things, and I want You're In Brookelynn to be a more genuine space for me. I want to use it as a place to grow- to post my photography and art, and talk about life, struggles, work, and whatever else pops in my head.

One of my favorite things to do used to be going out on a walk and taking photos of whatever caught my eye. Over the past few months my anxiety has caused me to become somewhat of a hermit, but a few weeks ago I randomly decided to pick up my camera and take a few photos outside my apartment in between classes. My apartment is literally a 30-second walk from campus, and there is a huge fence across from our parking lot that divides the properties. Every time I walked past it, I noticed the most beautiful red leaves and vines growing on it, and I really wanted to photograph it before all the leaves were gone. (And guess what, they are all gone as of when I am posting this!) Anyway, I'm pretty pleased with the photos!

Thanks for reading, and happy Saturday! :)

Woofstock: Puppies Everywhere!

This past weekend, I had the pleasure of going down to Chicago with some friends for Animal Planet's Woofstock Festival! It was a free, outdoor festival just for puppies! You could bring your own dogs, and they had tons of animals you could adopt there as well. My friends brought their puppy Marley, who I'm convinced had basically the best day of his life, ha!

The event itself was pretty dang cool. Not only was it basically a gathering of puppies, they also had Animal Planet stars, like the crazy cat whisperer guy with a guitar case full of cat toys. But the most exciting person that was there was LIL BUB! I was seriously sooo excited about this (I have an unhealthy obsession with lil bub). Unfortunately we ended up getting there an hour after the event started, and by then his handlers told us that he went back to his hotel :(, haha. Someday I will meet him!

One of the other big events taking place was an attempt to break a world record- the most adopted dogs in one place. I'm actually not sure if we broke the record or not- they probably announced it at the end of the festival, but we left before it was officially over. Anyway, they had to get all the adopted dogs in a fenced in area, so it was my perfect opportunity to meet & take pictures of some adorable puppies!

Marley meeting a much bigger Marley!

I hope you all had a wonderful day! And if not, I hope these puppy photos cheered you up :)

Sunset Bike Ride

Summer is finally here, guys! After being stuck inside most of the day at one of my two jobs, I have been in desperate need of some fresh air. So the other night, Skylar and I decided to take a little bike ride around his town. Since I don't actually own a bike (it got stolen...boo), Skylar's mom let me borrow hers, which is a really pretty mint green (you can see it 2 photos down). Isn't it adorable? I almost want to buy the same exact one. Would that be weird?

Anyway, we went out just before sunset, and I am so happy I brought my camera. The sky was so beautiful! We rode to the park, which was insanely flooded, but still managed to find a spot to hang out. Here's all the photos from that night!

The last photo is a composite image of 3 photos- this is the only photo that I think really does the sunset justice. Evenings like these are the best :)

Happy Tuesday!

Series: Fairy Flowers

Happy Friday everyone! I'm not sure if it's the same all over the US, but the weather has been absolutely beautiful here lately. Skylar and I have been going on lots of bike rides, and I couldn't help but stop and take photos of every pretty flower I saw. I decided to have some fun in post-processing too :)

♥